Things not to do when dating
On their blog site, Marc and Angel Hack Life, they shared their answers to a commonly asked question, “what does it take to create and nurture a healthy relationship?” Here’s what people in healthy relationships don’t do: #1.They don’t rush the present state of their relationships to get to better times ahead. You need to enjoy the company you care to keep, today, while you’re still guaranteed a chance to do so. They don’t expect their relationships to solve all their problems.The thing about obsessing about a happy ending is that you forget to enjoy the journey along the way. While a healthy relationship can certainly bring joy, it’s not anyone else’s job to fill in your empty inner space. Long-tern relationships are amazing, but rarely easy.Some relationships can’t withstand differing views on physical contact, so discuss this early and often. What hobby or side project keeps her up late at night? Can you support these passions and projects and get excited for them? Don’t just meet friends in a large group setting; intentionally get to know your date’s best pals. While introverts and extroverts can definitely make it work, being honest about your social life — how often you go out, how late you party, how many quiet nights in you crave — can help you both navigate busy, merging schedules. If you need to be doing something project-based or social to feel invigorated, share that. Does he aspire to living well below his means, giving most of his income away to charity?Sure, you’re having a great time together a few times a month, but do you really know where you stand, relationship-wise? As conflict is an avoidable part of life, discovering how your date deals with it is an important part of getting to know him/her better. If your date needs a night on the couch to feel energized and rejuvenated, try to respect that, too. How does your date make decisions regarding big-ticket items?
No relationship is impossible until you refuse to give it a chance. There’s nothing better for your happiness and your relationships than for you to be at your best, showing everyone in every way who you are and what you stand for. They don’t look to others for validation of their identity.Is one of you hoping it will turn into marriage and kids while the other is commitment-phobic and enjoys seeing more than one person at a time? Money and sex are two driving forces behind divorce.After a few dates, sit down to discuss your thoughts on relationships, commitment, and how you’d define where you currently are — and where you might be headed. Be transparent about your own spending habits and talk about your respective relationships with money. Does he secretly dream of starting his own business?Sharing dreams and goals can better help you assess if you can partner with each other in a way that enables you both to thrive.Marc and Angel Chernoff have spent over a decade coaching clients and helping them build healthy, lasting relationships.